my first day of school!!!!

If the reader is looking for a melodramatic story, I’m sorry to say you come to the wrong place or in this case the wrong blog! The story of my life is quite normal, with a few errors and mistakes…….okay a lot of errors and mistakes! It began quite normally in a hospital like many of the others. I’m one of those not so rare cases where the doctor who delivers the baby instead of slapping the baby, slaps himself! Yeah, another warning for the readers these cheesy jokes are the very foundation of my blogs so feel free to flee now!
                                                                 Okay here’s what I’ll share with you folks, some of the dumb situations I get myself into. They are quite hilarious to those who are not ME! To begin with, I was a really shy kid, stress on was. My mom told me about the first day at school. I was the only one not crying. My faint recollection of this is my mom dropping me off at the class and promising to sit outside the whole time.(a lie my innocent 3 year old mind believed completely) I walk into the class room where a lot of kids my age were crying for their parents. The phenomenon seemed like an epidemic only I was immune to, every now and then a new kid would walk till the threshold of the class happy, unaware of the fact that he is about to be stuck in this hell hole with his parents waving a quick good bye to him and disappearing. The moment they notice their parents are not coming back to get them, they go berserk. I was like an outcast, unable to cry, feeling a little guilt that I’m doing something wrong only I did not have the faintest idea what I did wrong! There was a heap of toys at a corner of the class completely unnoticed by the tear full eyes of my first classmates. It was the paradise of any 3 year old. Now I simply could not waste any of my time missing moms, when a heap of toys lay there begging to be played with ,now can I?
                                                    The crying finally subsided after an hour or so, I think because of the overwhelming number of kids who needed to pee (but they were totally confused by the complicated mechanism of the zipper). After the class the parents were all back to take their “educated” toddlers home. I told my mom and dad that the school place was not bad, I really thought so too, until the next day. My mom dresses me up in the uniform. That’s when I sensed something was wrong.(I guess it’s one of those things which are good the first time you try it, not so much afterwards) . Now here they were taking me to the place…. Again! The floodgates opened and with the tears came my desperate struggle to hold on to my one chance of escape……my mom. That hope died when I saw her wave to me (I was now now held in a vice like grip of two teachers). Only the previous day I was mystified as to why the kids were crying. Well at least then, I knew why!
                                                          I don’t recall any of my friends there, but I used to sit next to this Sikh kid named Pankaj. I remember his name well because once there was a terrible stench in my class……… like something crawled up in there and died (its common for kindergarten kids to shit themselves, especially with an incredibly intimidating teacher like the one we had) and the stench was traced to be originating from our bench. I knew who the culprit was so I kind of looked at him when the teacher came near. Oh how I regret that now! It seems looking to the side, is a sign of guilt in kids who shit their pants. Because the teacher caught my ear and took me to the aaya(the janitor lady) who took me to the bathroom and strip searched me for any signs of lethal weaponry. I was acquitted of “the crime.” Well I don’t recall an apology but, I still hold kind of a grudge on the kid called Pankaj.